Sally's Holiday Special

Hey guys! It's the holiday season! In 2020! And you know what that means...

So much suffering is just around the corner!!!

Wait- are we not on the same wavelength?

Let's digress down Sally's memory lane. When I lived in New Orleans, I worked the graveyard shift at a 24 hour diner. We had weekly "specials" that were off-menu items like Meatloaf and Gravy or a Kitchen Sink Omelette. What made these items special was not that they were high in quality- just that there were extra ingredients starting to rot in the kitchen that the cook was trying to get rid of.

Why oh why did I just insert this gross image into your brains? Well, I want to start this conversation by reminding everyone that just because something is "special" doesn't mean that it's better. So if we start to think of the holiday season as just being different- not better- maybe it will be easier to navigate it and survive it.

Of course there are some things about holidays that are awesome and joyful and I wouldn't change for the world. But for so many of us, especially this year, the holidays hold unrealistic expectations of "togetherness" and delight that set us up for failure.

As a parent, I feel immense pressure to make Christmas unforgettable. To tap in to my kids deepest desires and then make those a reality for them- while also making it appear effortless and at no cost to me or our family. In fact, the cost of Christmas and the holiday season is immense. Can we just stop and own that for a moment? The decorations and the presents and the meals and the orchestrated togetherness DO NOT APPEAR OUT OF THIN AIR.

I'm not for a moment saying we should abandon traditions. I'm saying we should be able to acknowledge our hard work and then also have grace for ourselves and our families when things don't go as planned. Because I can guarantee that no matter what the holiday is, where you are celebrating, or who you are with- it will not be perfect.

So instead of aiming for perfect- what if we aimed for good enough? Instead of the holiday season being "the most wonderful time of the year," what if we reframed it as a season where routines changed, expectations shifted, and sometimes we spent time with people who we wouldn't normally hang out with? Instead of hiding all the work and orchestration and awkwardness that comes with holidays, what if we acknowledged it and made room for it?

This is a shift I am aiming for in my own household and my own circles. And if I happen to have some really beautiful moments with some people I love deeply- I openly invite that. And if I happen to have some really difficult moments where I question my choices or others choices, I invite those too.

Happy Imperfect Holidays!